Once
he was slightly educated, the thought that got to him the most was
the fact that he realized that this isn't how life is supposed to be.
He learned that his lifestyle wasn't just. In chapter seven, he comes
to realization when he helps the two fishermen that this will is how
the remainder of his life was destined to be, and that thought
haunted him. Something he mentions in chapter seven really grabbed my
attention, Douglass states, “I
often found myself regretting my own existence, and wishing myself
dead; and but for the hope of being free, I have no doubt but that I
should have killed myself, or done something for which I should have
been killed,” wishing to be dead is a powerful feeling, and he
wouldn't have known that being free could have been an option if he
was never educated.
Him
getting some education can be perceived as “bitter sweet.” It's
bitter in a sense that he keeps having all of these negative thoughts
about how he will never be free, but it sounded almost impossible.
Sweet comes into play because now that he learned how to read and is
now starting to learn how to write, he can fully understand the issue
and actually do something about it. Slave owners were right in a
sense that the slaves would rebel if they had an education, and that
is exactly what Douglass plans on doing.
I agree with you that Douglass did in fact regret his ability to read and his knowledge about abolitionists, “I would at times feel that learning to read was a curse rather than a blessing” (Douglass, 84). However, just because he previously was unable to read does not mean he was necessarily ignorant to his surroundings. He noticed that he was the slave and catered to his masters and he realized that there was a higher standard of living. A reason Douglass became so tormented by his reading was discovering what the word, abolition meant.
ReplyDeleteI feel as if regret is a common theme in literature and is extremely common in the literature that we have read in this class. Like the regret that Douglass experiences after learning to read, that Wieland regrets after realizing the great mistake that he had made, and that Georgiana would have surely experienced for indulging Aylmer, in his need to rid her of her birthmark, had she not died from this tragic mistake.
ReplyDeleteWieland states “I thought upon what I had done as a sacrifice to duty, and WAS CALM. My wife was dead; but I reflected, that though this source of human consolation was closed, yet others were still open” (Brown, 122). It may seem as though he does not regret it because at this point he does not but quite a few pages later he comes to regret his actions. “A beam appeared to be darted into his mind, which gave a purpose to his efforts” (162). I saw this phrase as being the appearance of regret in Wieland because on the very next page he takes his own life. I also saw this as a mirror of the bitter-sweetness that you said came with Douglass’ learning to read. In this instance Wieland finds it sweet that he was able to fulfill a mission he was given by God but there is the bitter ending with the death of his family and then Wielan himself.